Well, I haven't had much to write on the blog about over the past several weeks and that makes me very sad. This being an extremely busy time of year for me; I don't seem to receive many messages from Aaron. I know that it is because of me; the fact that I am running constantly, too busy to sit quietly and take it all in; and not because he is not sending any messages. But, when he is quiet I start to get anxious and worried that he will stop communicating. Even though my logical brain knows better than that and I do feel him all of the time, my heart and my "mom" me, become sadder as each day goes by. My friend; Melanie has her own stuff going on right now and she hasn't heard anything from his either, which only compounds my feelings. We both keep saying "Where are you Aaron, we need some of your wonderful spirit". But nothing! He must be busy or maybe this is another lesson that I am supposed to learn. This, I think is part of the meaning of faith. You can't always touch it, feel it, see it, but you keep believing because you know that it is there. It is not always easy to have faith, to say the least, and for me it seems to be a lesson that will be ongoing.
And then yesterday afternoon.....
I was meeting Melanie for a quick lunch while I was running around getting supplies for my next event. We were both going to be on the same side of town so we decided to meet for a quick bite and to catch up. On the way, my youngest son, Jeffrey called me and since he had a break from classes for a while he decided that he would join us too. (He also needed to hit me up for some college cash- I wonder if that had anything to do with the impromptu visit ? hmmm.) But, neither one of us cared what Jeffrey's real motives were, we were glad to have him with us and for the time to sit and catch up with him.
Jeffrey was getting ready to head back to school after some good food and some good talk and all of a sudden Melanie asked him who's jacket did he have on. He was wearing a lacrosse jacket that had the number 42 on it. Jeffrey said that it was either Kyle's or Thomas' from school. Melanie said that Aaron was telling her that it was his and as she looked at the number 42 on the jacket, he was showing her by making the numbers glow. Melanie said that Aaron said that it was his number. Melanie looked at Jeffrey and I with a confused look on her face. "Why is he telling me that it's his?" Melanie had no way of knowing because she did not know us back then, but all four of the boys always wore the number 42.
That's all I needed. Just a quick hello from him to let us know that he is with us. It's not the message that is always so important, but who is sending it. Keep the faith.
Share Your Journey
This is a place where I hope that as you read about my miracles that you may want to share your stories as well. Every validation no matter how grand or how small will lift your heart. Please leave your comments or email them to me at gayleguadagnolo@gmail.com , and I will share them too.
My husband and I were living the ultimate American dream. We had a wonderful family and were proud parents of four beautiful sons. We were so busy enjoying and living life. It was springtime and everything was a buzz as we were making final plans to support two of our boys; who were members of the Syracuse University Men’s lacrosse team, as they competed in the National Championship Games. Then without warning our lives were shattered. Everything that we knew and trusted was ripped from our grasp leaving this unimaginable gaping hole. In the spring of 2008 our son Aaron was killed in a motorcycle accident.
At that time I was not convinced by any stretch of the imagination that there was anything after death, but I also could not accept that he was taken from us. I knew that I had to find a way to fix this horrible tragedy, but how? The hurt was indescribable. I just could not get my head around that this was it, he was gone. How could that be? He was our son, he was supposed to be with us, we were supposed to take care of him and protect him. This pain was too much.
A few months after Aaron’s death I met a Medium, Melanie May and as we later learned, our meeting was completely orchestrated by Aaron. I was reluctant to trust in the abilities of a medium but on the other hand, I would do anything, take any risk to try to get my son back in anyway that I could have him. When I met with Melanie, she told me things that changed my life completely again. She told me things from my son that no one else could know. She told me specific thoughts that I had had about a book that I was reading, and she described in detail the plaque that his dad was making to honor his life. When speaking on the phone she told me right down to the color of the clothes that I was wearing, where I was standing at the moment and the description and color of the coffee cup in my hand. The messages from Aaron that he told Melanie to relay to me were specific and current. He told her to tell me these things so that I would trust that it was really him, and that he was still with me only in a different form. This experience was so foreign yet so very consistent with his personality and his way of doing things. Aaron was always bigger than life. You knew he was there even before he entered the room. With Aaron, if you knew him, you got all of him, all great big 6’3, here I am package. So, his methods of getting his messages to me and the things that he told Melanie were as if he were right there in the room with me. He was so insistent and demanding at times that Melanie would start to shake if she tried to put off his requests for her to call me.
Aaron told us that there was a much bigger picture to all of what has happened. Part of this bigger picture is that I would write about my miraculous journey, to help others to know that our loved ones are still with us, only their physical life ends. My journey of miracles has happened so that I could know that my son is still very much with me and with us all. I have documented each miracle and message, they are true and as they happened. Many times I would doubt that this could really be happening, thinking that I have made up each message because it is what I so desperately wanted to hear, only to receive the next validation proving to me again and again that he is there.
I have found my son again, or I should say that he has found me and at his insistence I have opened my heart and my mind to this different world.
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